All To Myself
by Worse Than Teenaged Poetry
Summary: Marianas Trench tour insanity!  Any description I could write would just sound miserable, so simply read onnn.     DISCLAIMER: Josh and Matt are not mine, etc. None of these events are meant to be taken as reality.
1. Ellie

In some ways, time was a concept. For Eleanor Yorke, it was life. Unfortunately for Ellie, however, not everyone seemed to have this mindset.

The young woman paced the parking lot, a scowl on her face. Her maple-coloured eyes were glued to a clipboard, and she was clenching said clipboard as if her life depended on it. They had stopped here, in Niagara Falls, for the express purpose of _leaving, _something that she wanted to do as soon as humanly possible. She didn't like the gambling and tourism that hung in the air like a cloud of smog-which was also present, come to think of it. Regardless, they couldn't leave until Ian showed up.

Ellie had been the manager for Marianas Trench for roughly five years, and she excelled at this. She did so mostly because she was fantastic at planning and time management. She also excelled in threats, which was probably the real key to her success. In spite of the fact that she barely hit 5'3", she had all of the members listening to her as they would a military drill sergeant.

Most of the time, anyway. Apparently, Ian was choosing _today _of all days to test her authority.

"Damn, Ellie. Are you trying to make ruts in the lot? Because I think you're halfway there."

Ellie released the clipboard briefly to tuck back a lock of reddish-orange hair before glancing towards the owner of the voice: Josh Ramsay, front man of the band she managed. The male stood, watching her, hands in pocket, brows raised, mouth twisted in a way that was trying very hard to hide a smirk.

"Yes. I'm creating twin ruts-one for Ian's body and one for yours," she responded, scowling lightly.

That almost-smirk was replaced by a mock-gasp. "Ellie! Don't you ever think? They'll find our bodies for sure if you hide us there."

"Oh, right. I forgot." It was Ellie's turn to smirk, and she certainly did not bother to hide it. "I'll put you in Marianas Trench. It would be fitting."

"Un, that's not funny. That's just sad," Josh replied, in spite of the fact that his mouth was twitching. "And deux, how would you get us there?"

"A submarine and heavy weights," Ellie explained without pause. "And don't pretend that you speak French." Banter with Josh was part of her daily life; she was accustomed enough that she hardly had to think about it.

Josh hadn't done anything to his hair today; the blue-tinged fringe hung loosely in his face. He took a moment to rake his hand through the fringe, the result being it slicked back for the time being. "All right, sure. But when they enhance deep-sea travel, you're in for it."

"If I'm still _alive _at that point. Which, at the rate we're going, is doubtful," Ellie noted. "And by the way, that was cheating."

"What was." He sounded a little too innocent.

"Stalling. You pushed your hair back so you could think of something and pass it off as a riposte," she accused.

"I'm not even going to comment on the fact that 'riposte' is part of your casual vernacular," Josh snorted.

"To begin with, by claiming not to comment, you commented. And also, that doesn't change the fact that you cheated."

"I did not cheat! You're paranoid. Go and get your tin foil hat."

"Right. I'll get on that." Ellie glanced down to the watch that almost never left her wrist. Ian was _two minutes _from being late. She was absolutely going to kick his ass.

Josh, evidently, did not miss the direction of her glance. "Ellie, quit watching the time. He'll be here."

It really didn't take much to set Ellie off when she was on edge to begin with, and this happened to be just enough. Looking towards him with widened eyes, she exclaimed, "He'll be here _late. _Late, Josh! If we start off late, then the entire thing will be off! Don't you see that? It's an omen!"

After years of hard work on Ellie's part as well as the band's, they had a large enough fan base to come to America. This was a _big _thing, especially since the tickets were selling fast for this summer tour through the land of the free and the drug addicts. They'd even managed to snag a tour bus where everyone would get their own bunk bed, instead of the boys doubling up and Ellie smugly getting her own. This could be _so _immense for them, the main reason that Ellie was deeply determined that everything be _perfect. _And it most certainly couldn't be perfect if they got off to a late start!

"…listening to me?" Ellie blinked, catching those last three words as she returned her attention to Josh. "No. Of course not."

"No," Ellie confirmed. "But regardless, I bet that I know what you said. 'Calm down, Ellie. This tour will be fine, Ellie'."

Josh made a face. "With less 'Ellie's and _much _less sarcasm." He closed the distance between them, his hands moving to cover her shoulders. "Look, El. We've got great venues, guys who know what they're doing, and the best manager in the long-winded-but honourable-history of band managers. You need to just relax and let this run. All right?"

Ellie gave a minute roll of her eyes. "Yes, all right. I'll repose."

His grasp tightened on her shoulders, and he bent slightly so that his face was closer to hers. "I mean it. You're going to give yourself a stroke. That would be awful. Just…try and relax, all right?"

Ellie found herself staring up into those crystal-blue eyes, looking down at her so solemnly. That…problem was beginning to arise. The one where she found herself losing it a little bit, her chest clenching as she looked up at him. The one where thinking become a little sluggish and breathing a bit more so. The one where she kind-of, sort-of melted.

The problem was that more than occasionally, Ellie felt something that she most definitely should not for Josh Ramsay.

She forced herself to stop being an idiot. It would help if she could look away, but he seemed very determined that she _not _do that. So, she stared up at him and gave a minute nod. "All right," she murmured.

"Good." He continued to look down at her, in spite of the fact that she really couldn't think when he did that. Then, though, his gaze did move, flickering upward. He appeared…confused. And then suddenly not so confused. "Ian's here."

"Oh." Did she sound disappointed? She'd wanted him to look away, right? Shit. That was bad. No disappointment. "Good!" she exclaimed, and then resisted the urge to wince. Overcompensation? Most definitely. Josh released her shoulders, stepping back, and she quickly looked down at her watch to distract herself and avoid the perplexed look that was surely on his face. "He's less than thirty seconds away from death."

"I wouldn't speak too soon." Ellie looked up at that, raising a brow. Josh nodded to the area behind her wordlessly.

She turned. There was Ian, heading towards them with an expression that could only be described as sheepish. Oh, no. What had he done? It didn't take long to answer _that _question; all she did was look to the taxi behind them.

A figure was bending in the back seat, and Ellie caught a glimpse of neon pink tights adorning thin legs and a tiny little black skirt. The clearly feminine figure rose, and Ellie blinked. The short skirt was actually a short dress-sleeveless, nonetheless-and it hugged the thing but endowed body to perfection. The girl had a mass of glossy-looking soot-black hair, streaked carefully throughout with violet and hanging in her face. The shape of her face was…elfin, the chin and features arranged in a way that could only be described as such; Ellie could see that even from here. Her skin matched the elfin theme, pale and milky in a dreamy way.

Appraisal finished, Ellie turned her gaze to Ian, who had at this point approached them and was standing before her with the most hangdog expression she'd ever seen. She wasn't about to give him any sympathy. Crossing her arms, she asked, "Ian…who the hell is that?' Each word was enunciated quite carefully.

"That's…uhm, that's Korina." Ian ran a hand through his tight curls and then gave an attempt at a grin.

"Great. And I assume you brought Korina to help you with her bags?" Ellie pressed when he said nothing else.

"Uhm…" He looked back towards the elf-Korina, apparently-and then at Ellie. "I-uh. No."

"No." Ellie repeated the word carefully. She shook her head, turning away to look at Josh, who had quite a worried expression on his face. "Take." She shoved her clipboard at him, and he took it automatically. He looked down at it for a moment after this, his mouth opening, apparently to make some sort of protest, but she whirled around to Ian again, crossing her now-free arms. "Now, do you want to start explaining?"

Ian automatically took a step backwards. "Er. Well. Korina's my sister. And…she went through some trouble, and…well….and my parents won't take her in, but she can't be on her own."

Ellie didn't like where this was going _at all. _Trying _very _intensely not to yell, she ground out, "How the hell old is she?"

"Nineteen." Noting the look on her face, Ian pressed on hurriedly. "But she can't be on her own! The clinic stated very clearly that she's high-risk for-" He broke off.

"For _what?_" Ellie pressed. She didn't like this _at all. _His _nineteen-_year-old sister needed to be _taken care of _because she'd gone to some sort of _clinic? _

"For…" Ian's gaze slid to Josh, his expression pained. Ellie glanced over her shoulder, wondering if Josh knew anything about this. Apparently not, because he appeared puzzled. After a moment, though, this puzzlement cleared, and he seemed to understand. A frown quickly followed this. Why all of the expression changes? And why was Ian-

_Shitshitshit. _It was _heroin. _Korina had gone to a rehabilitation clinic for a heroin addiction, hadn't she? Whirling back to face Ian, she had to work very hard not to…_kill him. _She wanted to hit him so, so badly. She closed the distance between them, not so she could hit him-although her hands itched to-but so she could talk without Josh overhearing. "What the _hell _do you think you're doing, Ian?" she hissed. "Bringing family on this tour without even _warning _me until the _day of? _And with a _heroin _addiction? That's what it is, isn't it? She's addicted but she doesn't want to stop, so you have to keep an eye on her-right?"

"Well…yeah. And I-"

She was _not _giving him a chance to explain himself. "With Josh's past, you're bringing a _heroin addict _around here. _What the hell is wrong with you_?"

Ian's eyes widened at her last statement. Had it been more vicious than she'd meant it to? She didn't care. She could rip him apart with her bare hands right now. "Ellie! Calm down, will you? I think that Josh can handle it, and I really don't have a choice. My parents decided they wouldn't take her right before tour-"

"Right before tour. Right before as in _directly before?"_

"Right before as in three hours ago," Ian responded. "I tried to make arrangement, El, but I just couldn't."

Ellie was fully prepared to _continue _to chew him to the bone, but before she could make another sound she felt a hand's familiar weight on her shoulder. Turning lightly, she faced Josh. He was…calm, although a little worried.

"Ellie. You need to calm down." He'd said essentially the same thing that Ian had, but it was completely different. He seemed very…decisive. Ellie opened her mouth to speak, but he shook his head lightly before his glance flicked to Ian. "Go help Korina with her bags."

As Ian walked away, Ellie couldn't help but stare up at him. "Josh? Why did you-"

"Ellie, it's okay. You don't have to be my bulldog." He was talking over her, and rather than fight it she simply let him. "I don't need to be sheltered from this kind of thing." His gaze moved behind her, apparently to Korina, and he looked…well, troubled, but in a saddened way. He looked back to her. "I know what that girl is going through. The only difference is I knew how to stop. She doesn't, but if she can stay away from it, then she will. Let her stick around, all right? I'll be fine."

For some reason, this made Ellie _more _angry instead of less. He knew that her main problem with this was how it would affect him. This made her feel sad and pathetic in the worst way. She didn't want him knowing that she was so concerned about him, because she felt weak. This meant that she felt something for him that she wasn't meant to, and that she couldn't help but let anything that came in his way _affect _her. And that wasn't something that she wanted to be true.

"I don't like it for a lot of reasons, Josh." She carefully stepped away so that the hand that still rested on her shoulder fell. She wasn't looking at him as she continued to speak. "I have to rearrange things. I have to call the venues and warn them that we have another person traveling with us. I've got to work in food trips and her habits and probably baby-sit while Ian's onstage."

"I know, but-"

She interrupted him, not wanting to hear whatever compassionate Josh-thing he was about to say. "Josh. She can stay, all right? She can stay. It just means more work."

"All right." She allowed herself to look at him. The expression on his face was…relieved. He was glad she wasn't going to argue anymore. "Do you need help?"

He tended to help her out when she was swamped, making some of the calls for her. It worked well, because he was good at smoothing ruffled feathers. Right now, though, she was upset with a lot of people. Ian for bringing Korina along. Josh for knowing her real problem with Korina coming. Korina for…well, she wasn't sure yet. _Herself _for being upset and unable to help it. She didn't want Josh with her right now. "I'll take care of it. It will just be easier." Her voice was firm, leaving no room for arguments, but she knew that he was going to make one anyway. She drowned it out before it could happen. "Help Korina get settled in that extra bunk bed. We're taking off in twenty minutes. I have to take care of things while I still have a steady cell phone signal."

She didn't look at him again, because she was sure that he'd appear hurt. She knew that she'd have to find some way to apologise to him later, but right now she really didn't care. She didn't want to talk to him. She didn't want to talk to _anyone. _

She would immerse herself in organisation, because times and dates were so much easier than people.


	2. Korina

Korina absentmindedly watched the reactions to her arrival play out before her. As far as she could see, the small redhead was almost the death of her brother. From there, she talked to the male she identified from her brother's descriptions as Josh, and it looked like they had a bit of an argument. Then, the redhead stormed off and Josh was heading towards her.

Korina did not enjoy how this was shaping up to be at all. When her parents had refused to take her back in, she'd thought that Ian would just let it go. After all, she _could, _legally, take care of herself. It was only _recommended _that she be looked over. Ian had the tour coming up, so naturally she was expecting to be moving back into her own apartment.

And then he'd announced that she was coming on tour _with _him. She was off to trek across America in a small bus with three males she didn't know, her brother, and an apparently homicidal redhead. This was _not _going to be fun.

Moving her hair over one shoulder, the girl knelt to pick up her bags. She'd carry them back and then be shoved into the cubby hole on wheelsthat she'd have to live in for the next couple of months. Then from there, she would try _very _hard to find some way to have some fun, in spite of the fact that that seemed impossible at this point.

"Let me help you with those." Korina looked up-and up, and up-at the owner of the voice, Josh. Apparently, going after the redhead wasn't an option. Trouble in paradise?

"Sure." Korina stood, offering him one of the bags. She wasn't very tall-about 5'3", probably roughly the same height that caused her to call the redhead small-and he _was. _She wasn't sure that she enjoyed this fact.

He accepted the bags and gave her a friendly enough smile. "So, looks like you're on tour with us."

"I guess." She shifted the duffel bag she'd kept for herself over her shoulder. "Is it any fun?"

"Fun?" Josh gave a pause. "Well, there's a lot of travel. Bumpy roads, confined spaces, hours of nothing to do. But then there are the concerts. I think those make up for it. I'm just happy every man gets his own bed." He shuddered lightly. "Mike's a cuddler."

Korina gave a pout. "That doesn't sound like much fun at all."

"Oh, it's not. He-"

"The touring." She didn't want to know anything about man-cuddling. At all. Ever.

"Just wait. If you stick around for the concerts, you'll see that it's actually a _lot _of fun." He seemed to be trying very hard to make this work. She didn't like it. "We make up games, too. It'll be more interesting than you think."

"Games," she repeated doubtfully, staring at him. Clearly, he had a very warped definition of fun.

"All right." He shook his head. "What do you find to be 'fun'?"

She gave a small smirk, lifting her brows. "See. _That _you don't want to know." Was this suggestive? Maybe a little. She wasn't interested in him-she was pretty sure she'd seen glimpses of a _tongue ring-_but she wanted to see if he squirmed.

He didn't squirm, but he did give a shake of his head. "Right." Running a hand through fringe that was threatening to fall on his forehead, he continued, "So, anyway, the bus is this way." He turned, beginning to lead the way in that direction.

Korina pouted again as she sauntered after him, more than a little disappointed. "You know, it breaks a girl's heart when you completely ignore her implications."

"No, it doesn't." He looked back over his shoulder at her. "I'm sure you're looking for a way to shake things up, and you want to see me writhe. However, I'm a front man. I've had so many bras thrown at me that I don't even blink. One could say I'm immune to 'implications'."

"I could throw my underwear at you if you really want." It came out more joking than suggestive, and Josh gave a snort. She sighed. "All right. I'm not interested in you. I'm _bored. _And I'm going to be bored for a very long time." They were moving again. Korina managed to keep up with his stride, glancing towards his face for reaction. He seemed…amused.

"You'll learn that we aren't nearly as boring as you think." That expression of amusement reigned on as Josh made the way to the bus at last, sliding open the door. "And here we are. Casa de la road trip."

"House of the road trip?" Korina asked. "And why did you switch to English?"

Josh groaned. "I wanted to feel multicultural, all right? What is it with the female population and language technicalities?"

She smirked. "Do you mangle Spanish often?" She was slipping out of her usual "minx" persona without even noticing.

"Yes. I also mangle French and Italian. I'm multi-talented." Josh gave a nod, before looking at her. "Do you realise that you've just completely shifted personalities?"

"Well, you see, you're a eunuch. Therefore, I have no need for sexiness." That smirk was still on her face as she spoke.

"You make up your mind fast." Josh gave a shake of his head as he took a step back. "After you."

"Thanks, I guess." She gave a sigh as she climbed the steps of the bus. It felt a little like the climb to hell. There was no fun here, most certainly. She stepped back so that Josh could enter, calling over her shoulder, "Have you ever hit your head on the doorway?"

"At least three times." He was behind her as he finished this answer, sweeping his hand in a gesture to the interior. "This is your abode."

Korina noted that this entire area was eerily closed-in, the shape of a square with one corner cut, and blocked in by what looked like a wall. Directly to her right was a bit of a cubby with a comfortable-looking seat and a steering wheel: Driver's area. The cut-off corner of the square, she realised, was a curtained entryway.

Too curious to remember that she hated this, the girl took cautious steps forward until she'd reached the area. The curtains were attached to the ceiling by a miniscule rod, and she slowly slid them back.

She wasn't sure what she had been expecting, but the spacious room in front of her was not it. A couch that seemed to seat at least six with two chairs on either side took up one wall, with a thin oval table in front of the couch and an entertainment centre in front of that. It was somewhat crushed, but there was still room to breathe. To the left of this rectangular room was a sliding door. A door? Was that normal? On the other side of the rectangle was another door.

Lowered eyebrows forming a crease of confusion, Korina turned to face Josh, who appeared…amused. Was that his default setting? That didn't matter. "What…what's this?" she asked slowly.

"The bus. Ellie found it from some private renter guy who designed it himself. He rents it out pretty cheap; apparently he's desperate." Josh stepped into the living area, spreading his arms wide. "Main room." He pointed to the sliding door on the left. "Kitchen area." He pointed again, to the other sliding door. "Bunk room. The bathroom is between the two. The only way to get to it is through the bunk room, which is a bit of a pain-but what can you do?" He shrugged. "It's actually pretty awesome for a tour bus."

Korina shook her head in…awe, almost, before she realised that she was supposed to _not _be amused by any of this. Tossing her hair back and fixing her expression into boredom, she said, "Well, great. I've always wanted to live in a divided rectangle."

The amusement didn't fade from his face. If anything, it grew. Shaking his head, he said, "The rest of the guys are probably in the bunk room. I can take you there…"

"I can find it myself, I think." Korina held out her hand, requesting her bag.

With a shrug, Josh slid it from his shoulder and handed it to you. "There you are. Your bags will probably have to sit on your bunk while you're not in it. We were going to use the extra bunk, but…" He shrugged again.

"I was dragged on here, and now we're all a faux-family in a faux-house." Korina gave a minute roll of her eyes. "I've got it. You can go chase after that redhead now."

"That…that wasn't what I was going to do at all." Josh scoffed.

"Really?" She raised a brow, utter disbelief on her face.

He gave a frown. "You know, I was beginning to think that you and your brother looked nothing alike. Now, I see it. You both have mastered the same 'Josh, you're an idiot' expression. That's a little eerie."

"Well, when the situation calls for it, the look must arise," Korina reasoned.

"Sure. Go with that." Josh ran his hand through his hair. He was really having a hard time getting that fringe to stay. "I'm walking. And if I _happen _to run into Ellie, then so be it." She shrugged, that look remaining on her face. Perhaps this was the reason that he backed away so quickly.

She watched him go, and as soon as the bus door closed behind her she gave a shake of her head. What had that been? She didn't talk to people like that. Witty comebacks and sarcasm were not her thing. She preferred to slink and smirk and be _fun. _At one point, she may have-

_No. No thinking about the past. The present is what's in. _Forcing herself to not consider any of this anymore-because over thinking led to disaster-she turned and walked with purpose to the sliding door. As soon as she reached it, she could hear lowered voices. One of them was unrecognisable. The other was her brother. _He must be in there, filling in the rest of the members. _She wondered what he would tell them. "My screw-up sister is tagging along. Try not to give her any drugs." Something along those lines, because he simply didn't _understand. _None of them did. If they'd only try it…

Well, Ian never would, and there was no use in letting him gossip with his little band-mates. Flicking her hair back, Korina hooked a finger in the hole that replaced a handle and slid the door to the left.

She stepped inside, automatically gaining a sense of the surroundings before the people in it. This was a…polygon. A wall jutted around, probably an expansion of the room because the bathroom interfered. It was shaped, she imagined, like a rather rotund L. Directly to her right and in front of her were bunk beds, nailed to the walls. She was willing to bet that on the tail of this mock L was another set. In the centre was another curtain, which appeared to pull around all of the beds to create a centre space, but was for the moment bunched against a wall.

She stepped further inside, noting as she did that the voices had stopped. They'd probably stopped the second the door began to slide open, but she didn't acknowledge people until everything else was observed. Once you controlled your surroundings, after all, you could control the people inside the.

"Korina." The voice came from the curve of the rotund area. Stepping a bit further, Korina noted that her brother had moved to greet her. "You've found your way in here."

"Josh showed me." The three words were incredibly frosty. She most definitely did _not _want to make nice conversation with the man who'd dragged her along to this bus from hell. And that was what it was, fascination or no.

"Great. Well…" Ian ran a hand through his tight curls. "Mike and I were about to step out to the gas station across the street, since we're leaving soon." As if on cue, a moderately tall man with dark eyes and a brunette…faux-hawk stepped over Ian's shoulder, nodding in a manner that was clearly supposed to be greeting. "Do you want to come with?"

Come with her brother, spawn of the devil, and his faux-hawk band-mate to a _gas station? _As entertaining as that was… "I'll get settled." Her voice had not lost any frigidity.

Ian was not immune to the chilled tone. Giving a frown, he shrugged. "Well…suit yourself, then. Oh-have you seen Matt?"

Matt. That was the other member he'd mentioned. He sounded boring-brown hair, brown eyes, "good guy". It was enough to send her eyes skyward. "No."

"All right. Uhm…your bunk bed is that one." He pointed. "It's the one under Ellie's. I wouldn't advise taking the top. She wouldn't be too happy."

Fighting with an uptight redhead about who got the top bunk was even more enticing than going with Devil's Spawn and Faux-Hawk to the gas station. "Whatever."

He winced visibly this time, and then scurried off with his tail between his legs. Korina watched him go, not feeling any pity. How could she? He'd ruined her summer by dragging her along, here. If he felt bad about it, it was only because he _should. _

Giving a sigh, she moved to the set he'd pointed out, the one in the crook of the mock-L. She tossed her bags on the bottom bed, and then just…stood there.

How had this happened? She'd been fine one moment. She'd had her parties, and her friends, and she was _living again, _really living, flying like she'd never flown before. And then the next moment…it was gone. Someone not being careful enough, turning the music up too loud, screaming too much, and the party had been busted. It had been in the middle of a nod, so she hadn't been able to get her away and they'd taken her in…and the next thing that she knew she was in a rehabilitation centre for heroin addiction. The centre was miserable. Visiting hours were worse. Withdrawals were _hell_.

She'd been told towards the end of her stay that she had lost her scholarship. She hadn't been very troubled by this, considering the fact that she hadn't been to class in a month before her bust, anyway. She'd figured that she'd get a job, she'd stay with her friends, she'd go back…

Then they'd told her that she shouldn't be on her own because they feared she'd go back to it. It was only logical that she would, and so she hadn't denied anything. They had then called in her parents, who had stated very clearly that they wouldn't take her. After nearly a week of pleading from the clinic director, they still refused. They also refused to pay for her to stay at the clinic. It'd meant that she was _free, _that she was going _back. _

And then Ian had stepped in, and now she was _here. _

"Damn it!" she muttered, half-heartedly kicking the bed frame. There was no way to get out, and that was _all _that she wanted. No one would listen, though. No one would even try. They stuck her here, where there was no fun, and that was the end of it.

There was no sense in pouting. She knew that it would get her nowhere, but at the moment, what choice did she have? She was in this stupid mind-frame of-

Alcohol. That was what she needed to get out of this funk. They had some in the fridge, didn't they? They had to. It was a _band _on _tour; _why wouldn't they? Smirking to herself, she turned to head out.

Maybe the first day wouldn't be so bad, after all.


	3. Matt

Matthew Webb was not a complex man. He liked to laugh, and he liked to make people laugh. He liked to move around and keep himself entertained. He liked to be outside, and he liked to try new things. There were very few things that he _disliked, _but being in confined places was one of them.

This was why he was in the kitchen of his home for the next month and a half. He needed to get used to being in confined spaces again, instead of wandering outside like he usually did. This was why he sat at the oval table, a bottle of water in front of him and not much else. He was testing his patience.

And it was most definitely failing that test.

"Okay, Matt. It's not that big of a deal. You're just…inside. A lot. And very bored. A lot." He uncapped the water, taking a sip. "Look! This is the bad part. Pretty soon you'll have a lot of people to talk to. It won't be so boring when that's the case."

He gave a groan. Pracitising being bored didn't make you any better at it, apparently. Maybe he'd done well for a while…no. Glancing at his Blackberry, he realised that it had been two minutes. Two! He ran his hands through his dark hair for a moment, and then gave a sigh.

"Well. That's longer than you held out yesterday," he decided, cutting his losses. Thirty seconds had been the last time. Anyway, this didn't count! He was just sitting and doing nothing. When the actual tour started he'd be talking to people, and watching television, and playing with his Blackberry. "You've survived other tours. Just because you can't just fly anymore doesn't mean that you won't make it."

"I'm sure it's normal to talk to people who aren't there."

"Gyaaah!" Matt fumbled with his phone, just barely managing to keep it from smacking down on the tabletop. He turned his eye to the owner of the voice-one, by the way, that he'd never _heard _before. That worked, because he'd never seen the owner of it. The girl was…waif-like, surrounded by a cloud of violet-streaked black hair, peering at him with some of the lightest-blue eyes he'd ever seen. "Where the fuck did you come from?"

"The depths of hell." She stepped further into the room, a small smile on her face. "Or maybe it's heaven. I can never remember which."

"Those are some pretty diverse possibilities," Matt remarked, looking down towards his phone for a moment. God, she was quiet. He hadn't even heard the door slide open! Of course, that may in part be due to the fact that he had been talking to himself, but regardless.

"Hmm. If you think about it, they really aren't so far away." The girl raised her brows, the smile turning into a bit of a smirk.

He didn't want to even think about what she could possibly mean by that. There was something about this girl that he could tell from just the few brief seconds that he'd known of her existence, something…a little wrong. Not in an off way, but in the _true _sense of the word-wayward, mischievous. You didn't trust these kinds of girls for a second. He'd have to watch her.

Wait-why was he watching this girl who'd come out of nowhere? Matt shook his head slightly, asking, "So, who are you, anyway?"

"Oh. You don't know?" She raised both brows. She was advancing a bit more, approaching the table that he was sitting at.

"Why would I know?" He gave a small frown. "Are you hiding out on the bus until you can rape Josh? Because I promise that's been done before. Loads of times, in fact."

"I promise I'm not here to rape anyone." She didn't say it like she'd never try. She said it like it wouldn't be rape if she _did _try. "So, you don't know who I am. But I'm pretty sure I know who you are, Matt."

"How do you know who I am?" he asked in a rush, and then paused, blinking. Because he was in a _band _that was pretty famous around here. He forgot that sometimes! "Oh. Duh."

"Awh. Look at the modesty." She'd made it to the table by this point, but as opposed to sitting down she pressed her palms flat on the table and leaned towards him. "So, Matt, what is it that you do in this little band? I know you don't sing songs or play drums."

Why would she ask what he played? She had to know, didn't she, if she knew his name? "I do lead guitar."

"Oh. A guitarist." She gave a small, knowing little smile, leaning forward more. "Do you have the god complex?"

Whoa. _Whoa, _she was definitely in his bubble. She was close enough that he could see a tiny freckle on her ear lobe. She smelled like peaches. Matt happened to like peaches…

He scrambled to his feet, trying very hard not to shoot straight out of his chair. "What do you mean by that?"

Was it his imagination, or did she look amused? Whatever the case, she leaned back. The table was separating them, and Matt was a little grateful for that. "You know. All guitarists are on the cocky side. You think you're a guitar god?"

Normally, Matt would have responded with a grin and an _obviously, I am. _That, however, would feel a little too much like playing into her hands. Playing into her hands seemed like a _very _dangerous thing to do. "Nah. Just your everyday professional guitarist."

"Hm. Well, that's no fun." She turned lightly, beginning to…was she walking around the table? She was.

He couldn't back up. Not only would that be rude, but he'd look like an idiot, and…and he wasn't one hundred per cent sure that he _wanted _to back up. What the hell was wrong with him? "Sometimes it's better to be grounded than fun."

"Oh, no. Never." She was still sauntering around that table. She appeared to be approaching him, and then-she turned, the smirk on her face unmistakable, and headed for the refrigerator instead. Matt relaxed immediately, an undeniable sense of relief coming over him. That? That could have been bad. It could have been very bad.

He really shouldn't be on his toes constantly about this girl. He needed to…find his balance. He was just a little off-guard because she was attractive, and young, and _very _good at the flirting thing. Those were probably the most terrifying qualities that a woman could possess.

And what the hell was going on? He didn't even know who this girl was. She could be from nowhere. She could be some crazed fan from hell! Yet, he was casually carrying on a conversation and trying to dodge any flirting that might be going on. Because there was always the off chance that he was wrong and there might _not _be anything, and…

Matt was _very _confused at the moment.

The fact that she was digging in their refrigerator wasn't helping. She'd opened it and was now bending down, checking the thing as if she'd find something behind something else. That didn't even make sense because it wasn't a _large _refrigerator. And _why was she in there in the first place? _

"Uhm. Hey. That's, uh, our fridge," he pointed out. He didn't want to be rude, yet at the same time he couldn't exactly let a _stranger _dig around in there.

She paused in her digging, and then slowly stood, closing the door before turning to look at him. He was expecting her to look guilty, or offended-something along those lines. Instead, she only appeared amused. "Ian really didn't talk to you, did he?"

"You know Ian?" How did she know Ian? Matt had never seen her before.

"Very well. Hooray for me," she stated, sarcasm dripping from every word. Was it strange how she somehow managed to add some sex appeal in there? Probably.

"Well, uhm, that's great. How do you know Ian?" he asked, shaking that previous thought off.

"Well, I can tell you how I don't. I didn't meet him on the street. And I've never been _interested _in him." She sounded disgusted by that thought.

Well, great. That told him just about _nothing at all. _Giving a small sigh, he noted, "You know, if you don't tell me who you are, someone else will."

He expected to get a response, but rather, her mouth just turned up into that damned smirk again. She stepped towards him once, twice, until her toes were mere inches from his. He should really move back. He couldn't remember how. He just stood as she looked up at him, seeming to know full well that he was frozen. "Good." She enunciated this carefully, leaning forward just a bit more. "I like the thought of you asking about me."

She turned and crossed the small area. The way she walked screamed to be looked at, but she didn't even hesitate slightly to see if he was watching. She didn't even turn around to close the door, but slid it shut with two fingers. And he didn't move. He watched her go.

_Shit. _He was in for it.


	4. Josh

Josh wasn't so sure that he liked Ian's sister's perception skills. She'd claimed that he was going after "that redhead", as she'd put it. That wouldn't have been much of a problem, except that it was true.

On one hand, why wouldn't he go after her? Ellie was his best friend; she had been for _years. _She was upset at this particular moment in time, because of Ian, and Korina, and work, and maybe even _him. _

On the other hand, the fact that she was possibly upset by him was what bothered him the most about the entire situation.

He didn't like it when Ellie was angry at all, but when that anger was directed towards him he felt terrible. This was the reason that he rarely ever upset her-and when he did, he found a way to fix it as soon as possible. Generally, when Ellie was irate, there was a plausible reason behind it, something that he had clearly done to upset her. He would follow that logical trail and proceed to make things up to her.

His current dilemma was that there wasn't really a logical reason behind her anger at this moment. He hadn't…well, he hadn't really _done _anything, had he? He'd tried to convince her to let Korina stay on the bus, and he'd tried to keep her from murdering Ian. The only rational reason for her anger, therefore, was the fact that he'd gone up against her.

He couldn't apologise for that, however. He felt that this truly was the right thing to do. When he looked at Korina, he could easily find bits of pieces of himself. He could see easily the parts of his past he didn't often think of. He recalled how the nod had felt, and how at one point it had seemed to be the only thing that was worth it. He was reminded of how _everything _had crashed down, and how he'd had to try so hard to pick up the pieces.

He knew that he'd only gotten out of things because picking up the pieces was what he'd wanted to do, _needed _to do. He was also very aware that Korina didn't want to pick her pieces up yet. She wanted to go back to it, probably because it was so enticing. The main reason to go after the heroin was because it was so much better than reality. She had to have had something happen that made her _want _to escape. She just needed to see that there was so much that could be done without the heroin, that things were worth it.

And he was hardly even making sense to himself. His thoughts were a jumble of strong emotion and determination whenever he thought about Korina and heroin, because he was so close to the situation. Maybe that was the main reason that he needed to help her with this.

It was _definitely _the reason that he couldn't go with Ellie. He couldn't let go all of these strong convictions to please her. Oddly enough, there was a small part of him that _wanted _to, that would throw all of that away to make her smile at him again. That was the part that wanted to go after her.

He stepped from the bus to the parking lot, a small frown on his face as he automatically scanned the area for Ellie. He found her easily enough, a small, brilliant-haired figure on the edge of the parking lot, pacing back and forth. She was on her cell phone, the hand that wasn't holding it to her ear occasionally waving in the air to mark some sort of point that she was making. He found Ellie's hand gestures entirely too amusing. She claimed that they were ridiculous, and when she was calm-ninety per cent of the time-her hands remained perfectly still. But, when she was verging on being overwhelmed by thoughts and emotions those hands would go flying. They were also more prone to moving them when she was on the phone, most likely because the person that was on the other end wouldn't see them. Regardless of the reason, he enjoyed watching her make these motions. He had to be careful about it; if she caught him staring, she would discover that she was doing them and stop.

Was it bad that he could think that much about how she talked with her hands? It probably was, but…well, he couldn't help himself.

He watched her a moment longer, his frown deepening to the point where his brows lowered subconsciously. He wanted to go over to her, but…well, that would be bad. She was taking care of things. She didn't want to talk to him. If he went over before she was ready, things would just get worse, and…

Josh didn't want to make them worse.

He gave a sigh as he settled for leaning against the bus and watching her pace. She was waving her hand less frantically, pausing in her pacing. Eventually, that hand went loosely to her hip. A moment later, she moved the phone from her ear, apparently done with the conversation.

He could tell simply from the way that she held herself as she looked at the phone that the conversation had ended in Ellie-victory. She didn't stand erect, or hold the phone like she'd want to throw it. She did, however, stare at it for a long moment, before letting her head fall back. The hand not holding the phone came up to push her red-orange waves back, and then remained on the back of her neck, apparently gripping her hair. This was also easy to decipher: She was frustrated. She'd probably made quite a few phone calls already. She would have to make even more, soon, and the people that she'd already called were not cooperating, which generally meant that there would be a trend.

God. He wanted to go over there _so badly. _He wanted to take the phone from her hand and smile gently and tell her to relax. He _needed _to make things better for her. Maybe he could just-

"Do we need to arrest you for stalking, Josh?"

Josh gave a bit of a jump, and then immediately leaned back even more casually to cover up for it, pushing his fringe back as he was doing far too often today. "How'd you come out of nowhere like that?" he accused.

"I, uhm, opened the door." Ian pointed backwards to the bus door. "I then walked out. Mike did so as well, and you didn't even notice, because you were wishing for a pair of binoculars."

"I was not wishing for a-" There was no point in arguing. Ian would think what he wanted, regardless of whether or not Josh had actually been watching Ellie. Even though he had. "How long do you think she'll hate me?"

"Ellie? Hate you?" Ian gave a roll of his eyes. "Not long. You guys are always _right there. _You know, sometimes I think that-"

"Well, don't," Josh interrupted quickly, scowling a bit.

"Whoa. Down, boy." Ian raised his hands in mock surrender.

He hadn't been _that _emphatic, had he? "Sorry. Well, just, don't." He frowned lightly, stepping away from the bus and glancing back towards Ellie. "How long is not long?"

"You know, Josh, you can't fix it all the time." This came from Mike, who had until this moment been silent behind Ian. "Ellie's the most irrational person I've ever met. She'll fix it in her own head, in her irrational Ellie way. You'll never figure out how, and if you're wise you'll never _want _to, but she'll fix it."

"That could take a long time," Josh noted with a sigh.

"Or it could take five minutes," Mike retorted.

"I guess…" Josh's gaze found her again. She was on the phone again, one hand still to the back of her neck, and seemed no less frustrated. "It's just…she's angry, _and _she's overworking herself. I don't like it."

He looked back towards his bandmates in time to see Ian nudge Mike in a "do you see what I see?" way. "What?" he asked, and then, when Ian raised his brows, "_what?_"

"Nothing." Ian shook his head. "She'll fix it, Josh, and there's no use sweating it until she does. Or watching her like the clue to fixing it yourself will magically appear above your forehead." He looked towards the gas station across the street, and Josh automatically followed his gaze. "Mike and I are going to go stock up before we hit the road. Want to come?"

He knew that Ian had a point. If he stood there and watched Ellie, it wouldn't do anything at all. He should probably go with. Even as that thought occurred to him, he heard himself state, "Nah. I think I'll hang around here."

Ian and Mike exchanged glances, and then Mike shrugged. "Suit yourself," Ian replied. "You know where to find us if you need to."

Josh muttered a noncommittal response, his eyes already on Ellie again. She was back to pacing, but she wasn't quite hand-waving yet, although-yes, her hand did twitch once. A moment later, it was flying.

He wished that she didn't work so hard. She'd have grey hairs by the time she was thirty. She'd work herself into a stroke, or heart attack, or aneurysm. She wouldn't give up, though; she'd work herself straight into some sort of medical disaster akin to the ones he'd mentally listed, and if she happened to survive one of these disasters she'd continue working.

She took this _so _seriously. Josh was well aware that this band wouldn't be anywhere without this dynamic girl working as diligently as she did. He knew that she frightened even the other band managers with the intensity she took this with. It wasn't even because she made money when they did. It was _more _than that. Ellie had always loved music, and she tied herself into the process to the point where she may as well have been a member of the band. Hell, she was just important, and Josh didn't know what he'd do if they lost her.

He didn't know what _he'd _do if they lost her.

He shook his head to clear his thoughts, and that was when he noticed that Ellie had stopped pacing, the phone in her hand. That would have been fine, except for the fact that she had turned. And she was staring right at him.

_Shit. _Josh immediately looked away, raking back his fringe with a heavy hand. He'd been staring at her throughout his thoughts. He'd been staring at her _before _his thoughts. She could have noticed this at any time, and that worried him more than a bit. If she was still upset with him, then the fact that she'd been staring would not please her at all. He'd have a lot of harried explaining to do. And he didn't even know how he'd begin to explain it in a way that would pacify an upset Ellie-

"Josh?"

Yeah. That tangent had _not _been helpful at all, especially since he'd not had any time to go over much. Josh stood up straight as his head whipped up to face Ellie, who was standing before him, expression unreadable. "Oh! El. Hey."

"You're very bad at being casual," she noted.

"I'm-" He broke off, looking her over. She didn't seem to be upset. Her maple-coloured eyes didn't exactly give away much, but he was almost positive there was amusement somewhere in there. "Yes. I sing. I don't act."

"We certainly wouldn't be touring America in that case." Her expression still wasn't exactly clear, but he was seeing little things-the way her brows were relaxed, the ever-so-light twitch of the right corner of her mouth.

"I guess not." He leaned against the bus, expression hopeful as he looked down at her. "Are you mad at me?"

"I…" She shook her head. "What would I have to be mad about?" Before he could even begin to consider how to answer that, she went on, "There was just…a lot to take care of. But it was easier than I thought. I've gotten almost all of it done, and they didn't put up a fuss."

Josh gave her a knowing look. "That's why you paced the parking lot, waving your hands like a mob boss. Because they didn't put up a fuss."

"Well…" She frowned. "Considering the fact that I've got to run this girl's passports, identification, and find room for her backstage, they didn't put up much of a fuss."

He studied her face for a moment, not liking the worry lines forming in her forehead at all. He lifted his hand, feeling a strong urge to smooth those lines away, but then slowly let that hand drop. "I'm sorry, Ellie."

"Sorry?" She cocked her head lightly. "What for?"

"For…you know…the situation." He shrugged. "I don't know." He'd just felt the need to apologise for _something. _"For convincing you to let her come on."

"It's not your fault," Ellie replied slowly, gaining momentum as she continued to speak. "I mean, I was upset because-well, that's what I do when things don't go well, and you know that. And I wanted someone to blame. So I projected the blame on you. I shouldn't have done that."

_I shouldn't have done that _was as close as Ellie ever got to an apology, Josh noted absentmindedly as he looked her over. The statement made a lot of sense-and perhaps that was the problem he had with it. Ellie wasn't that logical when it came to emotions. Something told him there was more to the story…

But did he really want to ruin this by asking? She wasn't upset with him anymore, and that was all that he really needed to feel better. "Yes, well…" He trailed off. "El, this won't be nearly as bad as you think it will. Things will turn out fine, and you'll wonder why you ever worried in the first place." Without even thinking about it, he moved a finger to her chin, tilting it upwards just slightly so that his gaze met hers. "It'll be fine. All right?"

They always seemed to end up like this, with him reassuring her. Did this mean that he was her rock? He hoped like hell it was. That meant that he was something to her…

Not that that mattered. And even if it did matter…she was looking at him, and that was all that mattered at that moment.

"All right," she murmured lightly as he came to this conclusion.

He felt a slow smile lift up one corner of his mouth. "Good. El…we've got to stop meeting like this."

She gave a quiet laugh. "You mean I've got to stop verging on meltdowns."

"That would be nice." He chuckled. "Speaking of which, do you have all of the phone calls made?"

"What?" She blinked, apparently confused by the change in subject, but she caught on fairly quickly. "Oh. No. I've got a couple more…"

"Really." He stepped back, the hand that had tipped her chin upwards now spread out, palm-up. "Give me the phone."

"Josh, they're the most difficult people we-"

"_El. _Phone." He wasn't giving up on this. She needed the break.

Ellie shifted from foot to foot, and he knew before she moved to give him the phone that she'd acquiesced. "Thank you." He grasped it, then nodded towards the tour bus. "Now. Go relax."

"I don't think so." She raised a brow. "I am going to watch you make those calls. And you can complain as much as you want, but I'll have _hours _to relax when we're on the road."

"_Fine._" He rolled his eyes and gave a sigh, but internally he didn't really mind at all.

Ellie-time was _definitely _something he wouldn't complain about.


End file.
